


the Christian Grey Effect

by venusiaries



Category: Gintama
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Drabble, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2018-11-19
Packaged: 2019-08-25 21:41:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16668826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/venusiaries/pseuds/venusiaries
Summary: a meet-cute between a 4 year-old in a sixteen year-old's body and a sadist with a lack of self-preservation.





	the Christian Grey Effect

**Author's Note:**

> this has been in my drafts since the beginning of the year and it deserves to see the light of day, at least.

Every day.

 

Every goddamn day, this dude comes in the coffee shop with a different girl at his arm, barely looking up at Kagura when he places his order of [insert extravagant mix].

 

He’s good-looking, sure. He’s even supermodel-levels of handsome, if she were going to be specific about it. But there’s something off about him, and from his aloofness and the flashy way he dressed, Kagura wasn’t really surprised to find that he sleeps around the first week he started coming to Yorozuya.

 

And like, Kagura isn’t judging him from that alone, because she’s a well-rounded woman who believes firmly in the notion that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.

 

Even if, say, that said book is one of those trashy magazines that perpetuate hypebeast culture and oversexualize women.

  
  


Ah, who was she kidding. Of course she’s a judgemental bitch. It’s a personality quirk, or whatever. Sue her.

  
  


But it doesn’t really usually bother her any more than superficially. It’s cool for the most part. She has her fair share of customers who range from obnoxious to downright scum of the earth, it’s nothing she couldn’t handle. Heck, she even makes guessing their customers’ terrible lives from how they look a game with Shinpachi in their down time. He was bound to fall into their radar, considering he was a regular.

 

Today however, there was a problem with this guy that fell into her “probably can’t handle it immediately” category of life nuisances.

 

Because today, Kagura notes with no light amount of unsettlement as she counts his change, he’s got a particularly indiscreet series of scratch marks and hickeys trailing over his neck, going down past his collar.

 

Shinpachi spots it first, as it’s Kagura’s turn to man the machine at the back. He comes to her to relay the guy’s extensive (as always) order, but not before whispering that she should check out “ _ jake gyllenhaal _ ”, as they’d dubbed him, because he was looking “ _ positively debauched _ ”. Kagura, as per usual, was intrigued and excited by the gossip fodder as an old cat lady ought to be.

 

And, as character consistency was important when emulating a certain public image, she hid her double-take behind a carefully cultivated mask of mild disgust.

 

As he moves to walk away from the counter, she halts him with an ungraceful squawk that sounds like a cross between “wait” and “stop”, coming out as more of a “wop”, effectively grabbing the guy’s attention and ultimately embarrassing Kagura in the process. She swallows her broken pride, and levels him with a dead-eyed stare.

 

“You got a little.. something over there,” she says, scratching at her own neck to indicate where exactly she was referring to. He tilts his head just a fraction, but his face remains emotionless, as it usually is.

 

“Yeah, uh. She got a little wild last night.”

 

_ WILD _ , Kagura’s arsenic-addled thought process repeats at her in blaring neon lights, and she struggles to stay in place and keep her face neutral, instead of vaulting straight into the bathroom to empty her guts in the toilet. She fails to restrain a twitch of muscle around her nose, her nostrils flaring, and she swears she sees a glint of something in his otherwise lifeless eyes.

 

“Buy a leash, next time,” she mumbles, unthinking, and at that his expression changes to one of mild shock, his eyes widening and mouth opening the smallest bit.

 

A long silence stretches between them, then.

 

The change to his expression is subtle, but worlds different. He smiles softly, but his eyes hold a new glint, mischief bordering on creepy levels of shady. It seems he’s seeing Kagura in a new light, and it’s making an uncomfortable feeling churn at the bottom of her stomach.

 

“I suppose I should, then,” he says, swiping his drink with him, and as he reaches for the pennies Kagura has in front of her along with his receipt, he leans in, almost but not quite invading her personal bubble, and his smile grows into a smirk. “For the next time.”

  
  


As the bell at the door rings at his exit, Kagura actually does vault into the employee restroom.

**Author's Note:**

> i actually had more planned for this fic, but i got caught up with life stuff. Maybe i'll write for it again soon, add a chapter or something.
> 
> Thank you for reading!! <3


End file.
